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Friday, May 13, 2011

How do you know you love hip-hop?

Recently my friend and I were discussing our iTunes libraries, and noticed the music was measured in days, nearing a week and a half (I have since reached 16.2 days) of nearly all hip-hop.  This spurred a long discussion of other signs of our hip-hop obsession, ending in this polished list.  Let me know what should be added, or which points you found most interesting.

How do you know you love hip-hop?
when your iTunes is measured in days worth of music?
when your library has taken up every MB of space your laptop has?
when you've deleted phone contacts to fit songs?
when 99% of your wall to walls are centered on rap radar links?
when your fantasy team names are lyrics?
when you have a song titled specifically ‘sleeping’ and ‘waking up’?
when you own a physical copy of ‘People's Instinctive Travels and the Paths of Rhythm’?
when you own a vinyl of ‘Rappers Delight’?
when you spell 'good' as 'G.O.O.D' and 'album' as 'alblum'?
when you no longer think of good, lasers, or grind the same way?
when 'DWYCK' isn't a random arrangement of letters?
when half your iTunes lacks album covers, not because the music is stolen, but because iTunes hasn't heard of the songs?
when you want to say "that's not new" to literally everyone who talks about a song?
when you know Ice-T isn't a lawyer and you know lemonade is a popular drink?
when it's no longer 'stop, drop, and roll' it's 'stop, drop, shut em down, open up shop'?
when woop woop isn't a celebration it's the sound of the beast?
when one of the best verses you've heard involves a rapper washing his face, getting the file for his fingernails, taking a bubble bath, and using baby powder?
when you steal a 'Judge Asher' sign?
when bongress means something to you, and it is more important than congress?
when your rules for being a wingman come from CyHi and Asher?
when you know who Pittsburgh Slim is?
when you despise Pittsburgh Slim without hearing a single song?
when your new music comes out 3-4 months before it's new?
when you've dropped $100 to see people who haven't released music in 15 years? and will do it every year? but will never skip wu tang again?
when your biggest regret is not seeing Wu Tang Clan and Snoop Dogg perform?
when DJ doesn't make you think of flashing lights and extacy?  when you read that sentence and it doesn't make sense at first because all you can think about is 'Flashing Lights' by Kanye West?  when you put on 'Flashing Lights'?
when you know Kanye was right and Taylor Swift needs to shut the fuck up and sit the fuck down?
when legends are dead at 24?
when it's a quarter to 1 and you're doing this instead of a paper?  when you dont have a paper to do but are still up because too many songs are stuck in your head and you can't sleep until you've heard them all?
when 'rhyme' is spelled 'rhime'?  and 'quick' 'quik'? and 'light' 'lyte'?  and 'easy' 'eazy'?
when you can say 5 different names and mean the same person?
when you appreciate the work of Queen Latifah?  when that sentence doesn't mean movies?
when you aren't convinced weed is illegal?
when you've seen every episode of 'Trapped in the Closet?
when the thing you care about most in your car is what you're listening to?
when you've dropped $250 on headphones? $250 on a car stereo? and more on the music coming through them?
when you know why Diddy is famous?
when you're writing a paper at the age of 17 and Microsoft Word has to tell you the word is 'ludicrous' not 'ludacris'?
when it must be the aaassssss that got you like damn?
when you make this list?

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